Ouch

While I pretty much knew that it was going to be an adjustment having Ryan home, and I had an idea that we'd argue and whatnot in the beginning, I was completely unprepared for how vicious he could be.

After taking a vacation day today to take care of things for him (making sure I had all the proper paperwork for his road test on Monday, mailing back his XBox because it was broken, buying him a new dresser for his bedroom, packing up the rest of his dorm room, etc.), I took him and his best friend Billy out to dinner at Applebee's. He had to go there anyway to discuss when he could return to work for the summer. My friend Shpresa also met us there and I was looking forward to a nice, relaxing dinner after a very long day.

Yeah, well. It was clear that the tension was right at the surface, and all Ryan needed was an opening to let loose. I just didn't expect him to do it in front of other people like he did.

Shpresa is my friend who helped me organize my 40th birthday party back in December. She said she had run across the phone number of our contact person, and I laughed and told her that I still had the number in my phone, too, as I was saving it for Ryan's 21st birthday (in December 2008) So then I said to Ryan, "Hey, maybe we should have your party on New Year's Eve that year [his bday is Dec. 30] since you'll be old enough to drink." To which he responds "Cool! Can Tiffany sleep over that night?" Ummmm... really? So I said something like "You're really asking me about that a year and a half away?" (Meaning: who knows if you'll even be together then, and if you are, aren't sleeping arrangements something we can discuss as it gets closer?)

He then launches into a tirade of how I hate every girl he's with because she's not me. How I can't stand anyone he dates because I only want him for myself, how much Tiffany's family loves him, etc. It was so hateful and so hurtful, and it would have been less damaging if he had just slapped me. There's no need to defend myself because I adore both his current girlfriend and his prior girlfriend. In fact, I had just spoken with my father a few hours earlier and was bragging to him about what a great relationship Ryan and Tiffany had and how good I think they are for each other.

Needless to say, the rest of the meal was extremely tense. I couldn't pay the bill fast enough, and Ryan and his friend ended up walking home. We haven't spoken since, and honestly, this is not something that can be fixed with an apology. He really went for the jugular with this one.

My problem is that I had just bought him and his roommate for next year tickets for the Nets-Cavaliers playoff game on Saturday night. And now I have absolutely no desire to take them. I feel bad that Sean will miss out, but I'm going to end up selling them.

Not that I'm sure it even matters, because he will probably be working that night. I had asked him repeatedly to please tell them he could start working on Monday the 14th because we had the tickets for the game on Saturday, and then for Sunday -- Mother's Day -- I told him all I wanted was to go to the Mets game that day. So, after he spoke with them tonight at Applebee's he came back to the table and said he's working on Saturday and Sunday. I was in shock. The only thing I asked him for was to be free on Mother's Day to go to the game, but apparently that's a busy day and the tips are good, so.... here we are.

And to think that just 8 months ago I was devastated by him leaving... ha!