I don't get it

The "it" I'm referring to is death.

For some reason I can't wrap my brain around the concept of someone being here one minute and gone the next. I also catch myself sometimes thinking "how unfortunate that that happens to everyone else; I'm glad it won't happen to me!" I actually think that!

This concept was brought front and center today when my dad called to tell me that a woman who had been my mom's BFF waaaaay back in the day (when they both had young children and we all used to play together) was killed in a car accident over the weekend.

It was more shocking than upsetting, and I don't mean for that to sound heartless. I hadn't had any contact with her since I was in high school and she came to visit my mother. I know that they exchanged Christmas cards every year and that was pretty much the extent of their contact. She and her husband had divorced years ago, but remained close friends. Out of the blue, he emailed my mom, my sister and me to wish us a Happy Thanksgiving a couple years ago, and we went back and forth with email updates, but nothing more. Just what everyone was doing with their lives, etc.

After my dad told me, I had to call my mom and tell her. It was not fun. What I hadn't realized was that she and her friend (Ellie) had gotten back in touch after her husband emailed us and had discussed plans to get together sometime soon. They emailed sporadically and it was just something they meant to get around to doing, since it had been many many years since they'd seen each other.

One of my mom's first reactions was that she wished she'd kept in better contact with her. I could literally feel her pain through the phone, having just gone through something similar.

It's just so sad; she was a young woman, early 60s. She had three kids, and a couple grandchildren. She was on her way to meet her daughter at a spa in Palm Springs when she lost control of her car, and it went off the road. I just can't comprehend it all. She got up that morning, probably excited at the prospect of time with her daughter, packed, left, etc.... and then died.

The idea of that being her last morning alive... her last night sleeping in her bed.... the last time she spoke with the other people in her family... it just makes me realize that truly anything could happen.

It puts everything in perspective when you hear of something like this. I won't pretend like I was close enough to her to mourn her passing in the usual way; to me it's more the thought of her family and what they are dealing with now. And what a tragic loss it is that someone so young is now gone.

Makes you appreciate every day you have, no?